Let's Do The Time Warp Again

A wise Arizona Indian chief once said, “Only a white man would believe that you could cut a foot off the top of a blanket and sew it to the bottom of a blanket and have a longer blanket.”  Wisely, Arizona does not observe Daylight Saving Time.

In my opinion, this is a very logical observation. Nevertheless, year after year we in other states fool ourselves by continuing to sew an hour to the bottom of our summer days and cut it off again in the winter. The custom began in 1918 though it wasn’t wildly popular and so was discontinued in 1919. Unfortunately, the practice was resumed in 1942 and referred to as ‘war time’ and damned if it didn’t stick.

In 2007, immediately following the manufacturing of my radio alarm clock that was pre-programmed with the time to change automatically on the last Sunday of October, a law was passed to end Daylight Saving Time on the first Sunday in November. Lord knows I’m stubborn. So for the sixth year in a row, it seems I would rather be late to work than replace a perfectly good alarm clock. Just because some do-gooder thought it would be helpful to invent a smart clock is no reason for me to have to spend my hard earned money on a clock that I don’t have to arm wrestle with.

I awoke for the fourth time on Monday, October 28^th (It takes at least four snoozes for my eyes to fully open). I sighed and turned the alarm off and prided myself for resisting a fifth snooze. I always feel guilty (but not enough to stop) for hitting the snooze button because my husband is also in the room and although he never complains would probably prefer that I wouldn’t insist on sleeping in 9-minute intervals when I should be in the shower. 

So there I was taking my time, thinking I had forty-five minutes to get ready, when I looked at the kitchen clock. I always wish I could catch that look of stupefaction on video so I could show it to myself in preparation for next year. I had fifteen minutes to get dressed, paint on a face and drive to work. I transformed myself into one keystone cop and managed to only be fifteen minutes late. The same thing happened last year, and the year before…etc.

The next night, I tried setting my smart alarm clock to the correct time but in the middle of the night it readjusted and I was late to work again. On the third night I got smart and set my alarm an hour earlier so I wouldn’t be late yet still have time for a couple of nine minute intervals. Success!

I would be happy if I could remember that I will be an hour early for work the last week of March but we all know I won’t.